Saturday, May 18, 2013

Se Fue

In our neighborhood, there are a lot of friendly people. Damaris was the most friendly of all. She was 8 years old, adorable, full of life. She would always yell "Jenna!" and run to give me a hug. I felt welcomed, and loved.

She told me last Saturday on the way to choir practice, "I might move to the states to be with my mom, but I don't want to go. I have my sister here, and my cousins and friends. I would rather go later, when I'm older." This Thursday, she announced she could no longer come to choir practice. "I'm going to the states, but I'll come back to visit in August." I am assuming this means she is going illegally. Which means no visits.

I saw her sister today in choir. She told me I could take Damaris' name off her choir notebook. I put it by my desk, to remember her. I feel like I have lost a friend.

I hope she arrives safely. I pray.

This is an example of the "family disintegration" that happens as a result of poverty. The parents have no choice, they have no money to feed their family. They move to the states, and leave their children with their grandparents, aunts or uncles. This makes it economically possible for everyone to live - the cost of living is significantly cheaper in El Salvador, meaning a little money from the states can go a long way.

Kevin was born in the states, but his mother didn't have enough money to take care of him. She sent him back to El Salvador, and his grandmother raised him with care. Last month, at 5 years old, they sent him on a plane by himself. His grandmother had him study photos of his mother, and practice saying her name. 

His grandmother didn't have the heart to tell him the truth. "We're going on the next plane, we'll see you soon," she said. 

Of course they can talk on the telephone, the occasional Skype conversation if they have a friend with internet. But can you imagine, never seeing your family member again?

It is a death. A necessary sacrifice.

At the end of the day, there are more opportunities in the states, a hope for a better life. The minimum wage here is $8.00 a day, although many get paid $4.00 or $5.00. The minimum wage in the states is $8.00 an hour. The education system is significantly better in the US, the kids get the opportunity to learn English and art and music.

Sometimes it feels like many people in El Salvador are just biding their time until they have enough money to move to the states, where they can begin again. 

The store near our house closed, they moved to the states. One of our favorite restaurants closed, they went to the states. I don't know what the answer is. Part of the problem is a lack of jobs and resources, part of the problem is the family wanting to all be together in the US, part of the problem is a broken dream.

I will miss my friend Damaris. I hope to see her in Houston one day, maybe we'll speak in English. I hope she will give me a big hug with a big smile, like she did every day on our cobblestone street.

Hold on to what is good, even if it is a handful of earth.
Hold on to what you believe, even if it is a tree which stands by itself.
Hold on to what you must do, even if it is a long way from here.
Hold on to life, even when it is easier letting go. 
Hold on to my hand, even when I have gone away from you.

-Pueblo blessing









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